​1. Shelby the Chef ​

These people often spend approximately ninety percent of mealtime making up their own concoctions rather than eating the food already provided in the cafeteria. Sick of burgers? How about a burger with a pizza slice on it? You think breakfast cereal is boring? Turn it into puppy chow with some melted chocolate chips and peanut butter. Not to mention ice cream is one thousand times better in between two Caf cookies.

​2.Seven to a Booth Sally 

Those who have both an abundance of friends, and an iron will that refuses to sit anywhere other than the cushioned booth. Are they constantly in the way of those trying to safely walk from one area to another in the Cafeteria? Yes. Are they also the table having the most fun? Also yes.

​3. Impatient Ivan 

Ain’t nobody got the time, will power, or patience to wait in line for Stir-Fry. Rather than stand in a line, bored and hungry, these students multi-task by treating themselves to a full course meal while standing in line for the Show-Thyme portion of the Cafeteria.

4. Actual Rabbit Rodney 

All vegetables. All the time. Human being or actual rabbit? Either way, thank goodness there are students who inspire us to take care of ourselves when Mom isn’t around to nag us.

​5. Dinner Theatre Diane 

Students who typically enjoy a little Netflix while chowing down. No headphones? No problem. Why watch Parks and Recreation alone, when you could watch it with the company of your friends, in a cushioned booth, while enjoying a hot meal?

​6. Last Meal Larry ​

These are the people who take approximately ten of every caf item available. It may seem outrageous, but you never know when you’re eating your last meal. Or your last meal that’s not Ramen.

7. Breakfast Cereal Benny 

The students who cannot get enough of that peanut butter chocolate flavor. It doesn’t matter how gourmet the caf gets, Reese’s Puffs will always be the most comforting food in the world, and the line will always be the shortest.

​8. Food Allergy Francine 

These precious souls have the Cafeteria wired. Can’t eat dairy? They know exactly who to ask for soymilk.  They can also hook you up with a gluten free pizza, or a specially made fruit medley without the one fruit you’re allergic to. They may act like their food is black market material, but in actuality, the Caf is incredibly accommodating.

​9. Probably lives here Paul 

This guy is always in the Cafeteria. There’s no real proof he sleeps here, but every time you walk in, he’s sitting in a booth, twiddling his thumbs until the doors open.

10.Line up Linus 

These people do not mess around with lunchtime. Every day at 10:55, they are lined up, breathing heavily at the glass doors, as if they are about to take part in the Hunger Games. This is intensified on Wednesdays due to the infamous weekly chicken strip option.